How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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