I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
