adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Randomize
