Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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