If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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