then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Randomize
