is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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