I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
