Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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