haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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