It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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