$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
