i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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