He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
