is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I think I sprained my soul last night
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
