i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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