So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I want to be your penis for a week.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize