just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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