I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
