you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
