Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
