He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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