tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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