He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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