woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
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