her vagine was all disorganized.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
