So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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