Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
