yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize