Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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