found the other keg... it's in the tree
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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