I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
