No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
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