He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
