I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
