She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
