Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
