At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
