Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
