dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
