Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
