it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
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