I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
