Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
