I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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