you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
You ate ashes out of my bong
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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