I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
