You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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