white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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