I want to have your abortion
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize