I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
