if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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