This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
